Innocence

I read poems by supposedly great poets, talking bout the lost innocence they had in them, naturally as kids. There was this one particular poem I had in 12th (CBSE) where the poet talks how unreal and un-genuine people have become. I forget the name at present, but remember the wrong answer I had given to sir when questioned. I had answered the name of the poem when asked as “The Man with Many Faces”. The title was wrong, but it did suit the poem. The poem talked in length about how a person is in face to others and how he then behind their backs. How he forces a smile on his face even when he doesn’t want to; and so on.

The man and his different masks. I noticed it in myself, that I’m not the same with each and every person.” Me” varies as a person varies. That’s because, we’ve been taught to adjust. Adjust to changes. But this change? Change ourselves for others?

What do kids do? They don’t hide their exact emotions; they make it known; their happiness or sorrow, their pleasure or displeasure over something. They speak their minds out, in exact words. They don’t think of what a person is gonna think about him/her over his statement. They smile or laugh when they feel like, not forced. In short: they are frank, without intending to, because that’s natural in them. Because they are yet to be molded into AI’s like us. AI’s because we’ve been programmed to be the total opposite of what we were when we were kids. Programmed to be as what we are now. Unreal, that is what we are. Unreal even to ourselves. So unreal that we’ve forgotten what we really are.

I tried getting back that innocence. I started being frank. It was not accepted by people. I was tagged as rude, arrogant. I spoke my mind out, without any alteration in my words or emotions; I was tagged as callous, because it wasn’t accepted again... I was told I should mind my words, because my honesty had hurt people... The same behavior when exhibited by kids is found to be cute and appreciated and wondered, why isn’t so in grown ups too? And when seen in grown ups, they are tagged so as I was tagged. The sentence “Why isn’t it so in grown up too?” is forgotten then.

My friend said, I’m straight forward, but then it hurts people! It had hurt her. What the hell?? That sentence cancels out everything! Every bloody thing! What’s the point? How should u be then? Unreal? Speak for other’s pleasure.

Innocence will remain unfound, until this disease is not eradicated. It is lost. But then it’s right there, in the sparkling eyes of the kid; dropping from their mouth as words; in their actions. It’s right there in front of our eyes, we see it, but prefers to ignore it.